I felt sick. This was ridiculous, laughable even. I must have sat outside that school hall for half an hour willing myself to go in. My judgmental and inexperienced mind had a lot to learn about this addiction. How did it come to this? When would I learn that stalking, obsessive messaging and even jetting to another country to get the guy, was more psychological thriller or horror than fluffy rom-com. This was my normal storyline though. I chased uncommitted guys, I got sidetracked by married men and I used sex to lure anyone in, in the hope they would fall desperately in love with me; when all I really wanted was that closeness with someone, anyone.